Denimbeard's Journal

Exerpts from my writen journal.

Month: May, 2016


November 13th will be remembered as a day of solidarity for France. I worry for the backlash of racism that is about to come down around the world. Even now, as I sit at my desk at work, coworkers are discussing the border control and how Muslims will damage society as a whole. I hope that we can soon unite against a common enemy and see its destruction once and for all. This enemy of course being the hateful, bigoted and criminal nature of how we treat other cultures and people. We must show that we do not tolerate these types of actions but remain united in an effort for acceptance. Shunning those of different backgrounds is not the answer. Hiding and walling yourself away is not the answer. You must be willing to ask the hard questions and negotiate regardless of the threat faced.

My hope for all of our friends in France is that her lands stay vibrant and free. That they do not resort to violence or spying to suit vendettas, but instead hope to focus on the lives lost and rebuild from there.


Evans [my younger brother] birthday.

Robots replacing people. [In the job force, something that I would like to learn and talk in depth about.]

Juvenoia books:

-Teenager by Jon Savage

-Everything Bad is Good For You by Steven Johnson

[This entry was short, but I think it was meant to be a reminder for my future self. I can’t imagine that it was an actual coincidence that I would have the idea of industry robotics replacing people while remembering my family members birthday. There’s a strange dichotomy there, of wanting to advance and grow up, but being tied down to tradition and family.

I think that’s a very common theme in my life. Knowing that I have my own roads to take, but scared of what the traditions will provide for me. Do you run from them or mold them to your own needs? What takes less out of you?]

11/09/2015 [Even later, why did I do this?]

Camus over tea [Why is the tea important? Cause fuck you.]

“Without freedom, no art; art lives only on the restraints it imposes on itself, and dies of all others. But without freedom no socialism either, except the socialism of the gallows.”

There is a weight to the words here that I haven’t noticed in earlier essays. You can start to feel and experience the stress and connection of Camus as he finds his political prowess. What I like about him most is the way he is both unforgiving and increasingly unbashful. Regardless of where in this timeline I have read, he has been forward and articulate in a way that lends itself to wisdom. I can only hope that with my own coming of age that I can maintain a sliver of wisdom that would resemble this. I feel as though that has been a goal of mine for a long time. To fill this part of myself with knowing. For example I already know that I know very little. I contain such a small and fleeting sense of knowledge that I hesitate to say I know anything at all. This, of course, is what I fine entertaining about the idea that there is limited or limitless knowledge.

I rather enjoy watching my pet lizard observe the world around her. The way she moves her head in a jerking and sudden motion in an effort to keep pace with the data. It’s absurd. Her scope of knowledge is so limited, yet fundamentally complete. She knows and uses exactly the right amount of data to be successful in her existence and based on her reactions I can only assume there is a great deal of content in her life. She has a basic and relaxing expression of pure interest in her environment even while lacking the ability to comprehend the glass walls that surround her. In a way, so must we be [also].

11/09/2015 [Separate writing, later]

Personal, Camus

I would be very interested in hearing Camus’ opinion of the racial conflict current in many countries. It strikes me as strange that we can so easily ignore whole populations and still treat groups of people as second class citizens. A good friend of mine is currently having a large protest at her school. Someone had drawn swastikas in a locker room and the leading officials of the college were unable to contain the situation. I have a article to read regarding the events and demands of the protesting group. At a glace, it seems fairly straight forward. Increase minority protections, admittance and awareness, remove the offending parties and admit fault. I love how this group was able to quickly organize and rationalize their needs.

True effort was put into this and I hope an even amount, if not more can be returned.



“When historical truth is involved, the more anyone claims to possess it, the more he lies.

This line strikes me as particularly interesting. When given the rest of Camus’ essays this far, it is clear that he does not trust a government to maintain itself. Earlier he had spoken on the necessity of at least two parties being very active in a government, less you have authentic tyranny. What’s important to note here is that he suggests an ebb and flow between a multiparty system. I especially enjoy this line in reference to the comments my by the GOP at the last debates. When I spoke earlier of contrasting statements made by senators and congressmen about how they spent our money poorly, it very much resonates with the idea that the more “truth” they hold, the more they must lie. Listening to the debates in this regard makes nearly every candidate seem clownish. The only not having this effect would be Sanders. Bearing that, it feels as if that’s a lot of the reason for his popularity. He’s not claiming to know truths, but have solutions. However, this is still a problem for me, as his solutions feel like empty promises due to their scale. Finding a middle ground between truth and promise must be the challenge. Understanding that Idea would be worth study.

I’ve sent a copy of this passage to Matt. Hopefully he can shed some light on defining this situation.